Practical Guide Offers 30 Reminders to Help Highly Sensitive People Manage Overload, Shame and Judgment

An article published on the self-help platform Tiny Buddha presents a concise, 30-point checklist aimed at individuals who identify as highly sensitive people (HSPs) and often feel exhausted, embarrassed or criticized. The piece, written by site founder Lori Deschene, groups the reminders into three common stress points—fatigue, shame and external judgment—while underscoring that high sensitivity is a biologically based trait, not a flaw.

Understanding High Sensitivity

Deschene cites the work of psychologist Elaine Aron, who estimates that 15 to 20 percent of the population has a heightened sensory processing system. People in this group frequently notice subtle environmental cues, experience strong emotional reactions and empathize intensely with others’ feelings. Scientific literature links those traits to specific neural differences, notably deeper information processing in areas related to empathy and awareness. Additional context from the American Psychological Association notes that HSPs are more easily overwhelmed by loud noises, crowds or prolonged social contact, which can lead to physical fatigue and emotional distress.

According to the article, recognition of the physiological basis behind sensitivity can reduce self-blame and encourage proactive self-care. Deschene recounts growing up hearing the criticism “you’re too sensitive,” an experience she shares with many readers. She explains that discovering the HSP framework provided language and validation for her reactions, allowing her to replace self-criticism with practical coping skills.

Ten Strategies for Moments of Fatigue

The first section addresses energy management. The author’s main observations include:

• HSPs are responsible only for their own emotions and cannot resolve everyone else’s pain.
• Listening to a friend’s problems is helpful, but extended exposure can heighten stress and should be limited when necessary.
• Selecting quieter, less stimulating environments is a legitimate need rather than a social failing.
• Choosing not to attend an event that will prove exhausting prevents deeper burnout.
• Balancing instinct and anxiety is key; leaving an overpowering situation is acceptable even if others may question the decision.
• External demands become draining only when personal boundaries are unclear.
• Self-care is not selfish; adequate rest allows continued support for others.
• Sufficient sleep is essential for maintaining emotional equilibrium.
• Asking “What do I need right now?” helps identify immediate relief options.
• Brief calming practices, such as five minutes of deep breathing, can lower physiological arousal.

Nine Points to Counter Shame

The second grouping examines internalized embarrassment. Deschene writes that sensitivity, like eye color, is an innate characteristic and therefore not a reason for guilt. Key insights include:

• Emotional intensity derives from inherent wiring and contributes to empathy, creativity and depth.
• Approximately one in five people share similar neurological patterns, reducing the sense of isolation.
• Criticism for expressing or coping with sensitivity is undeserved.
• The narrative a person tells about personal worth can be reframed with compassion.
• Managing emotions does not mean eliminating them; observation without judgment is sufficient.
• Behavior does not define identity. Missteps can be corrected through apology and self-forgiveness.
• Crying releases physiological stress and demonstrates courage rather than weakness.
• Sitting with shame, instead of numbing it, allows the feeling to pass naturally.

Eleven Reminders When Facing Judgment

The final segment targets social criticism, emphasizing that outside opinions need not dictate self-image. The article’s recommendations are:

• Acceptance and understanding are available even if some observers disapprove.
• Self-compassion holds greater lasting value than universal approval.
• Others’ judgments matter only if granted personal significance.
• Being labeled “too sensitive” does not indicate wrongdoing.
• Lack of appreciation from others results in their missed opportunity for a meaningful relationship.
• Judgment reflects the critic’s perspective, not objective truth.
• Dismissing or minimizing emotions does not invalidate them.
• Disengaging from a dismissive conversation is permissible at any time.
• Ending relationships that consistently undermine well-being is a reasonable boundary.
• Perceived disapproval may stem from factors unrelated to the HSP.

Broader Implications

Deschene frames the reminders as tools rather than one-time solutions. She acknowledges difficulty recalling them when overstimulated but argues that awareness and repeated practice reinforce healthier habits. The article positions sensitivity as an asset that can contribute positively to society—through heightened empathy, creativity and the ability to notice details others overlook—provided individuals manage their energy and boundaries effectively.

Imagem: Internet

The guidance aligns with emerging workplace and educational discussions on neurodiversity, where recognizing different sensory thresholds can inform environment design and interpersonal expectations. Employers and educators are increasingly encouraged to create quiet zones, offer flexible scheduling and promote emotional literacy to accommodate a range of processing styles.

Author Background

Lori Deschene founded Tiny Buddha after personal experiences with depression, bulimia and complex post-traumatic stress disorder. Her intent, as stated in the article, is to transform personal struggles into resources for others. Tiny Buddha now features guest contributors, self-help guides and journaling tools intended to foster mindfulness and resilience.

While the current piece revisits content Deschene first shared several years ago, she notes that reader interest and her own recent workload prompted its republication. The list remains part of the site’s larger effort to provide accessible, evidence-informed strategies for emotional health.

Crédito da imagem: Tiny Buddha